Tuesday 7 June 2011

The Heart Ache of High School Graduation

I'm reading a lot of soulful blogs right now about little kiddies moving on from nursery school to "big" school. Yes, it's a new day, yada yada, - but for feck's sake parents - get a grip. It's not like they're vacating their bedrooms; it's not like there'll be a yawning gap at the dinner table every night; it's not like you're being left in a household of - (gasp) males wth no girl in the house to talk girl stuff with! 

Ok, I'm better now.

No. I'm not! I didn't think it would be this painful.

She's not ready. OK, scratch that! I'm not ready.

We finish high school FOR EVER on June 9th. Then we'll mess around for the summer, with a week of orientation in June, and then we'll come back from our travels and she'll go off to college in August.

And LEAVE.

She's told me that to mess with her bedroom will screw with her head for ever more, (poetic license) so despite the fact that it really needs a new paint job, I'll just go in there about five times a day  once a week, blow off the cobwebs and make sure the dog hasn't pooped on the carpet as a token of love.

And I'll get a web cam so we can Skype.

My heart really hurts, people.

12 comments:

  1. Oh I know how you feel...truly...I went through this last year, but you will be ok..honest!

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  2. I'm not looking forward to her disappearance to university, but I've got another year of Eldest at home first. Must remember to make the most of it!

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  3. I went through the same as you last year, I must say our relationship has grown stronger. She is now home till October so I am making the most of it till she goes back.

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  4. My heart aches for you. My one and only child only has one more year of high school - and it hurts now just thinking about him leaving for college.

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  5. My mom is a tough love mom -- she has always been very loving, but she never babied me (but she did my little sister, which to this day I still say UNFAIR). I always joked that the day they left me at college, she would throw a party to celebrate me out of the house. However, as my mom and dad got ready to leave after settling me in my dorm room, my mom turned to give me a hug with tears in her eyes. I couldn't believe it, my very non-crying mom was standing there crying because she was saying goodbye to me. In addition to making me cry, too, it was nice to see that she really would miss me being at home. So mamas, your daughters do love it, even if they say they don't :) Don't even get me started on how she was when she put me on a plane to live in Paris for a year...

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  6. Yep. Just when you think there's nothing worse than the first day at primary school.... you learn that was only the rehearsal.
    I've got another couple of years before it's just me and the dog looking at each other over dinner...

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  7. Son#1 graduates tomorrow night. Feel for you more than I can say. He will be going to Seoul with us so I will have him home for the first semester, for which I am very grateful. Not looking forward to the part where he leaves Seoul to start school in the US, though....

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  8. Oh , you will suffer more when you keep wondering what's going on away- totally away from your careful observance .

    But the " don't touch my room" comment indicates to me that she will be keeping in close contact ...and that she doesn't want the landing place to disappear in case she has to land into the security of the nest ....for a while anyway.

    Hug , kiss and cry when she goes ...it will reassure her even if she protests .

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  9. Sad... I am always seeking out parents of older kids to tell me my future. Though my son is just starting High School and it already feels like he isn't around for days on end (or rather in lost in silence in front of NBA playoffs.) The tragedy is: I saw so much of them when they were little, it felt like we'd been together for centuries and it was only 10am. ...

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  10. I know how you feel, hon. It does hurt. I remember feeling just bereft when my son left for college. But they come home from time to time and make sure you remember what a mess they can make. Still, i know I will weep when my daughter leaves in another year. Not going to pretend. It is hard.

    But you know, this also means you did your job as a mom spectacularly. Congrats to the graduate and her parents!

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  11. I remember when I was packing to move to England when I was 20 and my dad said, 'why are you bringing so much stuff?' and I flippantly replied 'because Im moving there forever.' Such an insensitive, stupid kid! I had no idea how much that must have hurt him (and had no idea how true it would be). I am terrified of having my sins come back to haunt me when my daughter is old enough to fly away...

    Anyway. Im thinking about you. This is icky, but its a new phase, next chapter, whatever. She will become a lovely young woman who will return to you as a friend. You'll see. Doesn't really help right now though, does it. xo

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