Monday, 2 November 2009

Day 2 - A.D.

A.D. - After Drugs confirmed

No bike ride yesterday. Instead we took a walk to make a game plan. He confessed before he peed. My husband was wrong, unfortunately. My husband, the alcohol and drug counselor was wrong. I, the mom, who only had a gut feeling to go on...was unfortunately right.

I'm in shock...but will do the next right thing.

Here is our plan, so far:

1. Son will wear new pants to school - not baggy. I took him shopping yesterday for a very quiet shopping trip -- I chose all of his clothes. He tried them on and had no complaints.
2. Son will wear new shirt - not a band T-shirt to school, and no more black sweatshirts.
3. Talked to guidance counselors at his school. Set up for meeting on Wednesday.
4. Son went on his own to talk to his guidance counselor as well.
5. Husband scheduled drug assessment with an alcohol and drug counselor.
6. I left school early to meet C off his bus. (no more rides home with friends)
7. Son is riding with me to take other 3 kids to a doctor's appointment. I am not letting him out of my sight until we get an assessment of how complicated this issue is for him.
8. Oh, and I took his prize possession -- his laptop. No more isolating by watching movies in his room. The big idea of this game plan is to bring him back into the fold -- to improve attachment - remind him about what is important.

Life was so much easier B.C. (Before C screwed up.)


  1. My heart aches for you. Sounds like you're tackling it the right way, though. With everything you're doing, he can't help but know you care about him. And some day he will respect you deeply for it.

  2. This is not good to hear,let alone LIVE!! But if it helps just one other parent, child it was worth writing it and sharing THANK YOU...

    I know there is more ...

  3. Oh no! You seem to know what you're doing though. I hope he stops right now and understands what/why you are doing what you are doing. Take care of yourselves as well.

  4. Every parent's nightmare. I wish you luck and strength to deal with it. It sounds like you have a good plan already.

  5. Thanks all. Yes, it is painful...can't begin to talk about it.
    However, he already told us that he knows we love him. He said that we are not the parents who throw up our hands and say, "oh well" or are naive enought to think, "not my child". I really think he gets it.
    There is hope.
    There is also strength in sharing this with other manic mamas.

  6. Best wishes. I went through this with my eldest, and there is hope. It hurts the meantime, and can seem very bleak, but there is hope.